Surviving a Merava-Over

Two days later the hangover and the headache have finally subsided. I have mixed feelings as I remember this weekend...
On the one hand, I laughed like a banshee, made merry with a truckload of people, danced, ate, won door prizes, laughed some more, kissed, hug, and lots of other naughty bits. On the other hand, I drank myself sick, got a whammer of a headache, and had to retire to my room alone...that part really sucked. I loved seeing everyone, but it was obvious that I've built alot of memories over the past 3 years, and the other half of those memories wasn't there. Nor was my new beau...He wasn't able to shirk his commitments to his beautiful daughter and her graduation party. I wouldn't have wanted him to. So there were questions, and some talking about it, which made the ghost of Mr really hard for me to banish. The worst was sleeping alone, although even that had it's positive swing....his jackhammer snoring wasn't there to keep me awake all night. My morning was super sexy, and I send out my thanks to my beautiful J&A... Also to Doc you crazy piece of work, Joy and her AstroTurf man-skirt, and of course....Len & Julia...Love you guys so much.
I had a half baked idea to run to Jill's after. After all, I was halfway there, and my sitter was willing to extend. I was hoping another of my friends from the last time would be there, and of course Jill needed some help to open the pool. Well, said friend didn't make it, but another did, and he and I decided to try. It didn't go so well, and I left feeling scared, much like a failure, and very confused. Of course being way overtired and overemotional didn't help whatsoever. Thanks to Jill for talking me down...thanks to Mr (yes damn it, MR) for caring and listening, and then most of all....Malcolm. You knew just what to say, and you won a big piece of my heart yesterday....bastard.
I was hoping to get a call this morning...I even made a SECRET wish. When the phone rang this morning, and it was him, I was so excited. He managed to get out "Hi beautiful, good morning, .....I was thinking.." "YES YES YES YES!!!" was my very adamant and boisterous reply. He laughed, and we made plans. He decided to take a vacation day because he didn't like that I'd been disappointed over the weekend, and he wanted to attempt to make it all better for me. He makes me so ludicrously happy. I feel free, and coddled, and scared out of my mind. He unpacked my car for me in less than five minutes, before I even knew what he was up to. He bought me breakfast, and made me fruit punch. Today we spent lots of time finding out our favorite things...favorite colors, movies, books, songs. I can talk to him about anything....from the renaissance, to the Lost Generation, to slavery, to a debate between The Color Purple vs Out of Africa (my number 1 & 2 movies, respectively). We talked about Hemingway, Arthurian Legends, the Fae, and James Brown. LOL!! He likes Lynyrd Skynyrd, and Queen, and Janet. He's diverse, and multifaceted. He pushes my comfort levels to the edges of sanity, while demanding I tell him my likes, dislikes and deal breakers. He told me about all the things he would love for us to do together, his vision. He told me he doesn't say things he doesn't mean, and that yes, it's all real. And he does that......thing. LOL, those that know, know.
The rest of the day was well spent...MWAHAHAHA....but I can go to bed feeling amazing, and worry free. I just feel good with him...no worries what tomorrow will bring, no worries about an awful truth falling out of the sky to kill me. I told him I want to be that girl he can't forget, the one that he thinks about in anybody Else's company. He laughed, kissed my nose, and said I already am. He's strong, and gentle. He's demanding, and he makes me accomplish things I've never thought possible. And he really understands the workings of my mind. That in itself is a hell of an accomplishment. He also told me today that I will never have to attend another event by myself because from here out HE takes care of me. Oh yeah....mmm!
So, Malcolm, you've made me a true believer, 100%