Last year, on my birthday, I received a note from DHS letting me know that they'd be in touch with me about some claims that were made. I've blogged this before, my mom's housekeeper, at the time, was upset that my mother caught her defrauding her time card, and called Adult Protective. There was mention of a child, and the case was immediately referred to Child Protective, and voila, all of a sudden it was MY problem. It was resolved completely in my favor, with an apology issued from the agency. My point in bringing this up is that I got that damn notice on my birthday, 2007.
This year, for some unknown reason, my mother, who lives with me, or vice versa, lost her mind, and decided she hates me. She started accusing me of stealing from her, and being every manner of whore, trollop, you name it. Oh, and she decided she hates my kid too. Nice. So I thought about things, I thought about the fact that my being unemployed doesn't buy the oil for heat, and I thought about all my brothers and sisters wanting me to move away from her so that she will end up being forced to admit she needs assisted living. With me not here, there isn't anyone to check on her. There isn't anyone to get her groceries, or shovel the walkways and steps, and sand, and mow the lawn in the summer. Or do the laundry, or get the screens up in the summer. There also isn't anyone around to go to the bank for her or be her fast food taxi. I thought about how the job I'll get, hopefully sooner rather than later, will be in the Portland area. I thought about Malcolm, and how being closer to him would be nice. I thought about the great school system there, about all the programs and fun things to do there. And I decided that my daughter and I, we need to move away. So we've been having talks about it. And my daughter is very sad, and I'm upset, mostly because this happened on my GOD DAMNED birthday again. And I'm worried for my mother. Because honestly, if something bad comes of this, I'll have a hard time cleaning my conscience. Reality tho....reality dictates that my daughter and I can't stand the verbal and emotional vitriol that this woman is spewing. It's just too unstable a situation.
So I tried getting excited about it, have looked into apartment complexes, and gathered names to contact, looked into waiting lists to get on. I also understand that this process may take some time to accomplish. I put up a blast on Myspace today to let my friends know. I suppose that means the fucking psycho whore read it too, true? Meanwhile, tonight, as I was researching this more, I got a call from Mr. He wanted to let me know that we just couldn't continue our friendship. No more calls, nothing. So this isn't new, but it is the psycho whore exerting her pressure on whatever hold over him she has. The ironic part is that I haven't done anything to merit this treatment, although, I haven't done anything EVER to merit how he's treated me. But for real, I haven't even poked the bear lately. I've been focused on my family, poking THEIR bears for a change, and talking to my friends, which I've reconnected with. I've been minding my own business while the psycho whore stalks me, day after day, looking for a reason to act evil. But guess what? I've got my own boyfriend, and I'm not trying to win Mr back. Talking to him is fun, but I'm not the problem. For all the missing times the psycho stalking bitch is trying to insert me into as the cause... I was busy with my own life, and my own man. I don't have an OBC page for him to contact, I'm not on True.com, or any of the other sex hook up pages he frequents, and I'm not interested in resuming a sexual relationship with him again, although I love to tease him about it. I was busy with my family both thru that Thanksgiving week and Christmas Eve. What about me threatens her? Well, I was the one she did wrong against, and she knows it. She also knows that his care for me goes beyond a sexual interest and it infuriates her. The real issue is that she already knows in her heart what the real issues ARE, but refuses to accept them. Like every other woman who's been burned by him, she sees all the red flags but wants to think that she's different. Delusions are a comfort, I suppose, when you aren't ready to accept the truth. So stalk me, rail against me, make me stop being his friend. The issue isn't me at all, and, psycho stalker, you know DAMN well that I'm not lying. You know, the great part is that I'm at a point that I actually feel sorry for her. She must be unbelievably miserable every day, always wondering where, when, and who.
And as for Mr? Well, he's finally succeeded in making me hate him. I think what I despise most in others is dishonesty and weakness. He's showing me both. Again. Oh, and I hate being used, and he's done that too. Again. He's a crafty old bastard, I'll give him that. There's a line in the Grinch that hit me this year, and made me think of him:
" But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!"
So I hope the both of them are happy, for they surely deserve each other. Me, I'm going about my business, same as always. Malcolm and I are happy, thankfully. Malcolm doesn't give me ulcers, or headaches. Only, so far, laughter and relief. There will be a day when Mr is sorry he's done this, again. He probably already is. And the lesson here is that you can't have people be in your life when it's convenient for YOU. Relationships, whatever they are, are a two way street. Friends are friends thru good times and bad. The fact that he'd be forced to give up his friends because of the insecurity of his lover is a big sign that said relationship is not built on sturdy ground. HMMM, I'll take away everything you love and care about so that you can focus on and love me. LOL, Good luck with THAT sentiment!
So Happy Fucking Birthday to me. It's been another great fucking year.
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