Second grade is memorable for me. I remember bits from each grade, but second grade really stayed with me. I remember Mrs Cote, that she was sweet, but fair. I remember being an excelerated student, and doing SRA reading projects to stay occupied while the rest of the class finished the work I had finished in 5 minutes. Second grade was a level my mother had considered skipping for me, but ultimately, decided she wanted me to stick with kids my own age...regardless of the fact that I was older already because of the cut off dates.
Second Grade was also the grade which saw me through the death of my father. Ultimately, teachers are not equipped to deal with trauma the likes of which my family suffered, and the solution to the white elephant upon my return to classes (I don't even remember how much time I was away from classes) was to instruct all the kids to not talk to me about it. Of course, kids being kids, that really translated as Don't Talk To Dot. I had a couple of friends that were dear to me though. Jeff, of course was always there to make me smile and make me feel like I belonged, fatherless and fat though I was. And Jenn, god bless her heart. And Angela. All souls I am so very thankful to still count as friends in my life today. So why the nostalgia?
My baby started second grade today. And she is so very like me, with her weight, her need for attention, her insecurities about friends and fitting in. She doesn't say it, but I see it in every movement of her body, and her eyes. And I see myself telling her to stop certain behaviors that, in my mind, inforce stereotypes that will hurt her socially. Yeah...who's insecurities now, right? So she went back to school in Not New clothes. And I compensated my guilt by sewing her an original creation (just don't look too closely, I never claimed to be a seamstress). I purposefully did not go back to school shopping, because the reality is that everything is provided for her. And we are trying to be conservative <<shudder>> when it comes to money. AND her dad needs to step up.
Her first day was great, and while mom stayed home fretting, and mentally composing this blog, Juju had an amazing day, filled with fun, and friends, and learning. AND the prerequesite 200 forms for me to fill out and return by tomorrow. I should be done by 2 AM. LOL. I'm so very proud of the daughter my baby is, and of the woman she is becoming. We may find ourselves at odds, and argueing, but the reality is that she is a really great girl with a big girl attitude. And as I find myself looking for books for "spirited" children, sometimes it's just a clue to relax, step back, and give her some breathing room too.
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